As a parting gift, outgoing English teacher Andrea Folds shared this poem at the final assembly, describing every single student she taught (Grades 5-12):
They say to get your message through, best to put it in a song.
Humans have short attention spans, and rhyming helps them drag along.
So here it is kids listen up, your teacher’s speakin straight
Forget your teenage insecurities, and believe me when I tell you, you’re great.
Sure roll your eyes and yawn and slouch, pull out your phone, that’s fine.
But these words will still sneak in and linger in the back of your mind.
I see you morning day and night, both at your best and worst
I hear you gossip, flirt and fight, I hear you bless and curse
So I speak with no illusions of your seeming innocence
You’re teenagers I’m well aware, victims of adolescence
Despite all this, for some strange reason, I actually really like you.
So I made a song of all the things that I think best describe you.
Alden gets the subtle jokes
Ale keeps kids alive
Angel brings the counterpoint
Angelee does a happy jive
Angelina floats above it all
Annalisse holds it all together
Anthony’s a walking almanac
Ayen laughs at all human endeavors
Camila’s earnest
Cata’s feisty
Cristina’s the future president
Cyrus keeps a perfect poker face
Dani’s artista in residence.
The other Dani has a secret joke with life
Diego has a secret everything
Elena’s sarcasm cuts like a knife
Eli has the driest wisecraking.
Emma bakes like Martha did before prison
Ernesto orchestrates wiles
Estesiy kindly calls you out when you err
Fabi intuits with ease through her trials.
Fabian fabricates
Fio enamors, and
Francis can stick draw the universe
Ga deftly legislates
Galen keeps going, and
Gilbert’s a human in blank verse.
Grace plays for team wins
Gudi pro tinkers, and
Izzy’s supremely confusing,
Jean Ca keeps cheer up
Jose Pablo dodges me, and
Josue does it all with fine swing.
Laura is thoughtful
Liam’s big picture
Luis is a house full of mirrors
Monica’s patient
MP is still pro, and
Nahomi’s a renaissance thinker.
Nahual is naughty, there’s no other word, and
Pablo is just as mischievous.
Riley’s a go-getter,
Ryan’s a love letter, and
Samir is abstractly frictionless.
Sara is wisdom,
Sebas integrity
Sequoyah a stop-motion camera.
Sierra’s a peace-maker
Suyen a care-taker
Swatty a galloping Samurai.
Tara scribes beyond her years
Tati inks new worlds
Thony has never been bored in his life
Zekiah’s an orange flag unfurled.
There you go that’s everyone, now I’ve proven that I know you.
So for the love of god, take my word when I say
That even though you kids take years off my life, like a decade so far
I wouldn’t have had it any other way.
